Photographic Memories

 I don't know my Dear Sweet Sistahs and Brothahs! My ol Black ass broke sorry muh fuckin mind maybe hasn't confessed this shit in thah written prose! But shit! 

No time like thah muh fuckin present! Anyway!...

I see these muh fuckahs gettin accused of all these sexual misconducts against women goin on!

I mean shit, like twenty years ago and shit!

Shit!

I don't give ah fuck!

Yah did thah shit!

Or yo ass didn't!

Tell yah ah little story Playesses and Playahs!

I went tah "IU" for a year! Didn't like thah muh fuckah! But that's besides thah point I was startin tah make! Anyway...

I had met this young lady on campus. We started hangin out and shit! Well...

One thing leads tah anothah and we wound up in bed togethah!

Well, shit...fuck it! I'll jUSt write thah shit how I revisualize thah shit in real time today!

I was getting ready tah penetrate and I looked into her eyes! And tears started flowing out of her eyes! And I'm like, "What the fuck!?" So I asked her, 

"What's wrong? You don't want to do this?"

I remember her shaking her head with tears now running down her face. Uhm! 

I said to her,

'All you had to do is tell me? I thought we were cool like that?'

She continued to weep. Then she finally conveyed tah my young now flaccid ass,

"Meredith! I have never done it before! And I do like you too! But I don't want to do this!"

God damn!?

I held her until the morning sun arose. 

We kissed one another as I left Collins dorm.

A day later she called me.

"Why haven't you called me, Meredith?"

'I know it isn't your fault. But I keep thinking to myself after seeing you in tears. Now if I would have penetrated her! I would surely be considered a rapist! And that shit ain't sitting too well with me right now. Just telling you the truth.'

"I didn't mean it like that!"

'But seeing your face as I'd seen it. I can't get that picture captured in real time out of my mind. I'm sorry. I didn't know.'

"How could you?! It is neither one of us fault?"

'I understand. But I still keep thinking, if I would have penetrated you and then looked up and seen what I saw?! You looking in total despair! Oh, my God! I could have not lived with myself afterwards! I like you Lady! And it is still kind of messing with me. Give me a little time."...

Uhm! I never spoke with her again!

"Why?!"

CaUSe that ill shit fucked me up!

And I was young and didn't know what thah fuck tah do with that heavy ill ass

Human shit!...

(Peace!)