Everything is broken. Mistakes. Too many to even mention or to list. And I guess one gets comfortable with the way life is instead of where this life may eventually go or turn into. I was lucky to be a loner. Fifty years old and having no children nor wife is probably the reason I am alive today. I have only had to worry about myself.
Everthing is this grayish dark yuckiness. And the sky. Even the sky is still gray. The sun? The sun hasn't shone it's brillance since Yellowstone erupted. I haven't come across another human being. I often think that maybe I am the only person alive; but I know that couldn't be. Could it? Definitely not. I have put it through my mind many of times thinking that living in rural Johnson County and being the only Black living out in these sticks that I may be the only "nigger" or white person alive. Wouldn't that be a hoot. But I know it wouldn't. No, that would be too much for me to handle.
I go farther and farther away from my farm. Since the Big Bang and the Fall Out I am now traveling six miles from my farm every day, in each direction, with not a sighting. It's seems as though I am in a bad dream or a very bad reality. I pray every night that it isn't the latter. But again, like today, I awake to nothingness.
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