"All right lil dicks," Drill Sergeant Ingram began, "Six weeks in, it's time for us to have an important discussion. So listen the fuck up! Very...carefully. I don't fuckin love yah! I don't fuckin care bout cha! Not personally anyway. As long as yah doin your fuckin job, soldering, when you are s'posed tah be doin it. I, nor anyone else in this here United States of America's Army is goin tah fuck with yah. I guarantee that. If you are a fag...I don't give a rat's ass, as long as you're doin yo damn job first, soldiering. But we don't have any fags in this platoon? Do we lil' dicks," Drill Sergeant looked around the room at all of us after the rhetorical question, "Let me just make sure. If you are a fag, raise your hand. We all have our freedoms. This is America damnit! So, raise your goddamned hand if you are a fuckin fag!" Again Drill Sergeant panned the room looking as if he were going to see a hand or two going up at any time. But he didn't. "Very fuckin good lil dicks! Outstanding! If you are and you didn't raise your hand, good for you. Ain't nobody's business. Yah keep that shit to your damn self. Don't need one of you mother fuckers tryin tah be a hero or some shit bout "comin out". This shit is about a brotherhood. And I don't know about you but while out there soldierin, I don't need to worry about someone in that brotherhood tryin tah fuck me! Do you understand me lil dicks?"
"Yes Drill Sergeant! Who-ah!" We all yelled out.
"Ya learnin lil dicks! Ya learnin! Out-fuckin-standing! Maybe one of these days you'll be a big dick like me," Drill Sergeant said with a smile. We all chuckled and got back into our military baring. "Y'alls sorry asses got two more weeks to go before you head out to your AIT, Advanced Individual Training, and you will be a full fledged soldier in this great United States of America! Can I get a, "Who-Ah!"," Drill Sergeant demanded.
"Who-ah! Drill Sergeant!" We yelled out as loud as we could.
"We are heading out on Bivouac today and won't be back for five days. And when we return I won't have too much time to talk to your helpless asses. But let me give you one more important piece of advice. And remember this one simple piece of advice, after the first one that I informed your asses of. After, always keep soldiering. The next one being, never fall in love. At least not until your soldiering days are finished," Drill Sergeant looked around making eye contact with every single recruit in the room. "Am I saying, don't get your dick wet. Fuck no! I'm saying get your dick wet but don't marry the watering hole. Because let me tell you lil dicks something that I know. On the various bases you will either visit and/or live on, the women love them some Drill Sergeants, a strapping man like me. And while your asses are away, soldiering, I'm going to be in your bed fucking your wife. Because like I said, they love the drill sergeants. And I don't turn away no available good pussy!," Drill Sergeant Ingram turned to the other Drill Sergeant in the room, "Am I lyin tah these sorry lil dicks Drill Sergeant Marnell?"
"Shit! They'll fuck Captains, Colonels...but they love us. Your sorry ass is gone for two to eight months at a time, that hole needs to be drilled on a regular. Vibrator my ass!" Drill Sergeant Marnell chuckled and shook his head.
"That's all we got lil dicks. 0900 formation, pack your shit. We's goin on a trip! Fall out lil dicks!" Drill Sergeant Ingram commanded.
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