Monday, July 7, 2014

"The Pet Rock" And Other Marketing Miracles (Thirty-Five Years Old, Honest Goldberg) 2013

Addressability, that’s what it was all about.  It was the Pandora’s Box that they were looking for.  They had tried many different avenues to come up with the ultimate mental control but most all of the actions they had come up with came up with not too much.  So I had suggested to them, quite innocently, in one of their goddamned numerous of nauseous meetings:

“Check this out.  We already have addressability unbeknownst to the subscriber.  All we have to do is to make them pay for not only programming but to have them program their given television programming for themselves.  And then you get all of the goods without spending another dollar and getting paid for them giving us the information.”  And what did that smart ass Jew say to me, “The fuck Honest?  They’re not that stupid.  I mean really,” he said scoffing at me.  And all that I said as a retort was, “Really Moses?  Your degree is in business with an emphasis in marketing.  “They” are the same mother fuckers that made that sorry ass mother fucker of an inventor of “The Pet Rock” a fuckin millionaire.” 


And your ass could’ve heard a pen drop.   

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